The following story was based on an interview conducted on the 20 April 2012. It contains excerpts from the interview as well as commentary by the author.
The curtain draws back and I walk out on stage.
The lights shine directly in my eyes, blinding me. My heart stops and I take a
breath. I make my steps towards the front of the stage. As my eyesight returns
I am met with the glares of a packed theatre. The heat from the blaring light
causes a sweat to form on my forehead as I grab the microphone from the stand.
How did it get here? I am 14. I am a kid, a child, an immature little boy and
somehow I end up on stage doing stand-up comedy? I’m not even that funny. All
I’ve got is this mic and my mouth, and somehow I have to make an audience
laugh. Gulp.
Meet Jordan Schulte;
comedian.
(Photo Taken by Tom Newby)
He is 17 now, only
just graduated high school last year, lives at home, studies at university,
works at City Beach. But at night he performs to crowds as a stand-up comedian.
To gig at pubs and clubs around Brisbane, you must be at least 18 years old,
but this hasn’t stopped Jordan to becoming one of Brisbane’s up and coming
comics. It was during his tenth year of schooling that he was thrown into a stand-up
comedy competition that ignited his passion for the stage. His friends are
responsible for convincing him to enter the Class Clowns comedy competition
where he was to perform five minutes of stand-up material to an audience of
strangers. He then became a finalist in the competition, and has craved the
microphone ever since.
My friends heard about this competition and
thought I should enter, so I did, and I regretted it immediately. I’d never
done anything like it before; I’d never even watched stand-up comedy before.
How was I meant to write a 5 minute set? But somehow I managed it, and I guess it
didn’t go too bad either. I was frantically pacing backstage; I thought I was
going to have a panic attack of some kind. Then the emcee called my name, it
was my turn. I arrived at the microphone and words started to come out of my
mouth. I couldn’t believe it though the audience was laughing! That first laugh
is always the hardest to get from an audience, it still is for any comedian,
but as soon as I heard the laughter for the first time, the panic, nerves,
fear, whatever I was feeling just disappeared and it was all replaced by
comfort. I finished my set and people started clapping, as the curtain dropped
behind me, I felt an overwhelming sense of relief, thank God it was over; but
for some reason all I wanted to do was get straight back out there.
He was never the loud
one in class, never the one shouting jokes across the classroom. He was quiet,
reserved and a bit of an outcast. He had trouble making friends, but it was
through his funny bone that he made a few. It all started here; telling jokes
to friends, being the crazy person his mates turned to for a laugh; he had
found his market. But it was never more than that. Never more than lunch yard
banter with a few of his friends. His grade five teacher told him he would
never be a public speaker of any kind. His grade five teacher said that Jordan
was one of the most timid, quiet, introverted boys he has ever met in his
teaching career. Yet somehow in seven years he would be stumbling onto stage
and perform at packed houses in the Brisbane Comedy Festival.
‘You will bomb’. That’s the best piece of
advice that someone’s given to me. Inevitably you will die on stage at some
point in your career, but what sets you apart from the others is getting back
up there, those comics who can get back up after falling flat on their ass. I
look back on it and to be honest, I don’t believe it myself. To not even be of
age, yet performing festival shows and performing with some of Australia’s top
comedians. I try not to take any of it for granted; I try to make the most of
every gig I get, because it is really rare to do what I do at my age. It comes
as a surprise to most people that I do comedy, because no one would really
expect that from the quiet nerd of the class. The most common reaction I’ve
gotten from people is “Oh, you’re funny?” which is a great boost for my
confidence. The biggest shock was from my parents who are still trying to
convince me to ‘get a real job’. I guess they just don’t like the idea of my
making a fool of myself for a living, when I could be a lawyer.
Jordan had his first
gig when he was 14, by 15 he performed to his first sellout crowd, by 16 he
co-wrote, produced and performed in a show at the Brisbane Comedy Festival, by
17 he had opened Brisbane’s first underage open mic room (which will be soon
running as an event at the Brisbane Powerhouse) as well as writing and
performing in a second show at the Brisbane Comedy Festival. He was always the
quiet one, but as soon as he steps out on stage he comes out of his shell. It’s
only been four years, and although he’s got a long road ahead of him before he
can perform professionally, it’s clear that Jordan won’t be stopping any time
soon. Stand-up comedy may not be where the money lies, but it’s where his
passion does, and that’s all the driving force he needs.
It’s hard sometimes. Constantly writing; worried
that you’re not good enough; scared that your jokes won’t register with an audience.
I sometimes even question why I do this. I’ve written jokes sometimes that I
found absolutely hilarious, then it fails time after time and you have no
choice but to drop it. That’s what the industry’s like, no matter what you
think, the audience are the final judge, if it’s funny it’s funny, if it’s not,
they will let you know, through soul destroying silence. But there is something
about stand-up that always brings me back; I have an addiction to the
microphone. This is what I want to do more than anything. When you destroy your
set, and everyone’s laughing, you are engulfed by a total euphoria.
I don’t
think I can get that from any other profession, I must perform.
